2017-07-11
今天给大家整理分析了一篇PTE写作范文，在这里分享给大家，希望带给备考的同学一些帮助!
"Public figures such as actors, politicians, and athletes should expect people to be interested in their private lives. When they seek a public role, they should expect that they will lose at least some of their privacy."
(病历文)
Everyone has the right to keep his/her privacy, including the public figures. People have the nature to learn others privacy, especially those of the celebrities for various reasons, such as reverance and curiousness, but it doesn t follow that they are entitled to pry others private life, and it is really unfair to say that any public figure choose to expose his/her privacy by himself/herself as long as he/she seek a public role.
In the current days, it is a widely spread atmosphere that people take a strong interest in talking about the private life of celebrities, they even rival each other in the fact that who knows more about a common interested celebrity. To cater such a taste, more and more mass media try their best to collect each aspect of a public figure s private life with an interest even exceeding that of making known their work. When we read a entertainment paper or magazine, we are certain to find that most of the content are the private life of singers and stars, such as someone got a divorce with his/her ex-girlfried/ex-boyfriend and is now keeping contract with someone else, etc.
All that exists is not valid, we couldn t say that it is in reason to spy into others privacy just because most people prefer to do so, and we should not just accept a unfair fact without exert any effort to change the circumstance. To put your own feet in the shoes of the public figures, do you feel comfortable to be watched everywhere you go, and find a lot of affair news about you in the media especially when most of the news are made out by the pressmen? If your answer to this question is no, you should aPTEe that we are obliged to do something to change the current situation about the private lift of public figures. Special laws should be enacted to discipline the prying into privacy of the mass media, sound should be heared arguing again people s interest in celebrities private life.
Only when the public figures are librated from the harassment of worrying about their privacy s protection, we can expect a better service from them, and in that case, more capable people will be attract to pursue a public role. Suppose that if a singer is followed everywhere he/she goes, how can he/she lead a normal life as common people, how can he/she gets a relaxation? He/she must be cautious when he/she every words, he/she can t expect a casual and relaxing atmosphere as every common people can enjoy. It is difficult for him/her to concentrate all their energy in working, as a consequence, we would lose some more brilliant performance we can expect otherwise.
In summary, we should call on the public to cease to spy into the celebrities privacy and pay more attention to their public life, only in that way can the public figure enjoy their life better and can we expect a better service from them. (496 words)
评析：这篇文章的主要失误来自作者未能仔细审题便下笔一蹴而就，题目所讨论的对象明明是Public Figures,从头到尾讨论的主体居然成了Public，说他们如何如何关注明星隐私，说他们如何如何设身处地地为明星们着想，最后总结说是公众应还明星们于自由之躯，把一上来合理的“否定回应”抛之脑后，从而导致文章“答非所问”。考虑到文章一上来合理回应，以及不错的语言表达，仅有几处不起眼的拼写错误，应判为“2分”(有严重错误类文章)。在出示范文之前，我们就此题谈谈“审题”和“回应”这两个基本问题。
(1)审题的原则：“字斟句酌，明确对象”，我们读题就是要弄懂题目要让我们干什么，然后才能相应知道该怎么干。PTE作文都是议论文，写议论文就好比“打仗”，知己知彼方能百战不殆。这个题目不难读懂，先翻译如下：“公众人物，例如演员、政治家和运动员等应该预料到人们对他们私生活的关注。当他们决定成为公众角色时，他们应该料到自己的一些隐私将被供之于众。”显然，经过审题，我们发现题目探讨的是公众人物“是否应该”预料到自己隐私的暴光。话题将讨论设定在这个范围内，同时给出了一个参考的见解，“他们当然应该知道”，并给出理由，“他们自己决定成为公众人物”。整个话题是个“should”类型的 ISSUE(详细分类见后文)，前后句呈”因果关系“(执果索因)。这才是完整的审题，才是完整正确把握文章的第一步。
(2)回应的原则：“攻其一点，兼顾其余”。也就是说，回应要找准重点，其余部分只须略微带过，作到“回应重点突出而全面”，这点在ISSUE和“ARGUMENT”中都是普遍适用的大前提原则，也是“高分作文”的要领之一。这里我们已经知道作这篇文章要从“公众人物”自身出发，以他们的角度来看待自己隐私是否该暴光的问题，这样我们就找到中心回应点是“should expect”,对象是“public figures”,而例证可以充分利用话题的友好提示：列举的三种人，选择熟悉易于表达的来充实论证，免了自己的劳神工夫，这种资源一定要善加利用，一方面可充实论据，另一方面，作到了兼顾其他，全面回应的原则。下面的范文采取APTEE的态度，采用should类文章的清晰“套路”，作到了合理回应，请读者就这方面仔细分析。
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